AussieTom

If you are looking for a nice soft comfy ride, than you cannot go past the Rancho 9000's, or the OME Nitro's. However, i think it is difficult to compare Ranchos to the Bilsteins as the are totally different in design and in nature. As someone mentioned, the Bilsteins are mono tube and also digressive, so they will offer a firmer more controlled ride especially around the city. where the Ranchos are totally different in design and nature. I have had both on my JK and i would say that I prefer the Rancho's for comfort, especially at slower speeds, and also prefer the Bilsteins for control and handling especially at faster speeds on rough country back rds.
I have had several shock and coil combinations on my Jk, as I have suffered the same firm and harsh ride as you. i analysed the difference in shocks until the cows came home to try and find the ride that would suite me. But in the end I simply bought what 75% of others have bought, and the fact that probably 95% of them are happy with them - Bilstein.
But the biggest difference was when I removed my E load rated tyres. Now looking to install the tyre that large % of people have, and almost all are happy with - Duratracs.

ShakyJake

Sorry, but it is the stiff springs that are most likely contributing to your rough ride. Go with a progressive rate spring and even a marginal shock will feel good. Take it from somebody who ripped out two lifts previously.